In the Big House/Transcript
This is an episode transcript for In the Big House. Transcript Jason: Hey, Michelle, watch out! This is Grandpa's stuff! You'll break it. Michelle: I know, Jason, this is really hard. Aaaahhh!! Hold on, Miss Pretty Pretty! A little help? Jason: I can't help you now. I'm gonna see if I can get it to fly downstairs. Woah! Woah! Oof! Michelle: Aahhh! I'm so sorry. Are you alright? Oh, Miss Pretty Pretty, did Jason step on you? Jason: What? You don't know anything about flying an RC plane! Michelle: Well, how am I supposed to know? I asked you for help, but you wouldn't. Jason: Well, I was busy. Michelle: Could you please show me how? Jason: "God helps those who help themselves." Michelle: That's not in the Good Book. That's Ben Franklin. Michelle: Come on, Jason, I never ask you for help. Don't you think I deserve a little? Grandmum: Oh, she's right about that, Jason. You know that the Good Book reminds to be helpful to everyone. Jason: I remember. "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act." Are those for us? Grandmum: Naturally. Grandmum: Maybe you could show a helping hand right now. I see an opportunity. Michelle: (struggling) Jason: Hm. Grandmum: Jason, before you enjoy another one of my persimmon nut crunch dandies, I'd like you to think more about how to offer some help, instead of making excuses not to. Jason: I'm not quite as hungry as I thought, anyway. Grandmum: Well, as you wish. But they'll be in the kitchen when you muffins need a snack. Jason: Gotcha, in the kitchen. Jason: Hi, guys. Michelle: Jason, can you help me with the plane now? Jason: Later, Michelle. Zidgel: Distress call coming in, cadets. We gotta move. Think you can grab them both at once? Fidgel: I believe so. I saw it in a cartoon once. Jason and Michelle: Woah! Fidgel: (coughs) Oh dear. Zidgel: Captain's blog: on our way to answer a distress signal, we just made a startling discovery. A galeezel isn't built for two. Fidgel: Hmm, I fear that the problem is-- Jason, Michelle, and Midgel: The Metric Magnetic Matter Disperser! Fidgel: Why, yes! Jason: Oh, no, not again! Fidgel: Not to worry, I'm sure another one will turn up, eventually. (cowbell rings) Jason: What was that? Fidgel: That was the distress signal. Shh, we're putting the call onscreen now. I'll get to work on this. Zidgel: Greetings! I'm Captain Zidgel. Cow captain: Oh, good afternoon, Captain. Thank you for answering our plea. Zidgel: What seems to be the trouble, cowgirl? Cow captain: Well, we're in desperate need of assistance, Mr. Penguin Captain. You see, there was this moon. Zidgel: Right, and let me guess, you were jumping over it. Cow captain: Precisely. We all were. Cows: (moo) Cow captain: When all of a sudden, a shockingly sinister ship just popped out of nowhere. Fidgel: Shocking! Midgel: Diabolical! Zidgel: Sneaky! Kevin: Chocolate! Cow captain: Now, we were terribly startled, you see, and, well, we stampeded. Just ran for it. You understand, of course. Finally, when we calmed down, we had to crash land on this grass-less speck of rock here. Rockhopper crew: (gasps) Cow captain: Only then, did we find that the villain had rustled our fuel catalyst module. Zidgel: Miss Space Cow...Ma'am, that sounds bad and all, but how can we help you? We don't have any...thingies. Fidgel: Perhaps, Captain, if we inspected the damage, we'll find exactly what we need to do to help them with their fuel module. Zidgel: Right. We'll hoof it over to you, I mean, be there in a jiffy. Midgel: Approaching bovine ship now, Captain. Zidgel: Well, let's invite ol' Bessie aboard and find out what the problem is. Midgel: Engaging transport. (slurping sounds) Zidgel: Welcome aboard, or should I say, moo? Fidgel: Uh, yes, now, please describe your fuel module, and perhaps we can construct a new one. Cow captain: Yes, yes, doctor! The module is like a big, oh, what's it called? It's round. Jason: A battery? Fidgel: A photoplasma cell? Cow captain: No, no, and, and lumpy. Michelle: Firewood? Fidgel: An atomic fusion reactor? Cow captain: No, and somewhat chewy. Zidgel: Heh, heh, a cookie? Cow captain: A cookie! Yes, that's it! A cookie! Preferably one of those persimmon nut crunch dandies. Zidgel: Wait a minute, you really run on cookies? Midgel: That's not so strange, Captain, so does Kevin. Kevin: And milk. Cow captain: Exactly, both milk and cookies. We already have the milk, of course, but-- Jason: You need the cookie. Cow captain: Affirmative! Without it, we can't mooooove! Rockhopper crew: (gasps) Cow captain: Sorry, cow thing. Midgel: Well, let's see if we can find out who stole your cookies. Midgel: Zoom in! Midgel: Baron von Cavitus was here. I knew it! We have to stop the villain. Zidgel: Cavitus. He's a bad guy, remember? Jason: Maybe we shouldn't get involved. Zidgel: After all, it's not like he stole our cookie. Zidgel: Okay, fine, but where in the cosmos are we gonna find a persimmon nut crunch dandy at this hour? Michelle: Jason, what about Grandmum's cookies? That would help them! Jason: Help them? Then it'll take us longer to get home! We don't have time for that. Anyway, Michelle, the galeezel's broken. Without it to make us big again, back in Grandmum's cottage, we'd be smaller than mice. Fidgel: Well, we have to make time to help our friends, but, I'm afraid he's right about the galeezel. And without a new metric magnetic matter disperser to fix it-- Cow captain: Oh, what was that? What did you say, Doctor? Magnetic matter disperser? Fidgel: Yes, ma'am. It's crucial to-- Cow captain: Oh, what an amazing coincidence. It turns out I've got something very similar. Would this work? Michelle: We're going home! Michelle: We're going home! We're going home! We're going home! We're going home! We're going home! We're going home! We're going home! Midgel: Don't get all excited just yet, Michelle. We haven't even gotten that cookie. Fidgel: In anticipation of that, I've devised a scenario for optimum bakery convection retrieval and implementation. Fidgel: I've got a plan. Rest of Rockhopper crew: Oh! Zidgel: Movie time! Kevin, get the lights. Midgel, popcorn! Fidgel: We fly home, the kids get big. We stay small, the kids get the cookie. The cookie gets small, the kids get small again. We fly to the cows, the cookie gets big, we give the small cows the big cookie, we fly home small, the kids get big, we leave small, the end. Zidgel: This picture's got everything! Laughter, pathos, adventure, two thumbs up! Let's do it! Rockhopper crew: Bonsai! Midgel: Hey, that's my line! Zidgel: Okay, Doctor, are you ready with the galeezel? Fidgel: Well, yes and no. You see, this metric magnetic matter disperser isn't... metric. Zidgel: Not metric?! Why, oh, why don't they catch up with the rest of the world?! Why does disaster follow us at turn?! Why?! Fidgel: Uh, I wasn't done. Zidgel: Oh, sorry. Midgel: So, can you get it to work? Fidgel: Yes, I can. But it's going to take significantly more power than usual to charge it up. Midgel: Sounds like we need to split up. Fidgel: Good idea, Midgel! You and I should work on powering up the galeezel. Michelle: While Kevin and I take Jason and get the cookie. Right, Doctor? Midgel: Captain, we've got an even bigger problem. The ladder door to the rest of the house is shut. Jason, Michelle, and Zidgel: (grunting) Zidgel: Kevin! Come here! Rockhopper crew: Woah! Kevin: Can we do it again? Zidgel: This! Had better be! A really good cookie! Grandmum: Jason, Michelle? Mind your step! You're a tad small to be rearranging the furniture. Jason and Michelle: (giggle) Zidgel: Let's make it happen, people. Go, go, go! Zidgel and Fidgel: Woah! Zidgel: Uuggh! Fidgel: Oh! Jason: Target sighted. Fidgel: Alright, Captain, a little more to the left and it will be perfectly aligned with the sun. Zidgel: Aye-aye, Doctor, just tell me when to stop. Fidgel: Focus, focus. Zidgel: (sniffs) Mmm, smell that? Who doesn't love barbecue? Fidgel: Oh, yes. (cries out in pain) Fidgel: Success! Fidgel: Oh? Cavitus: Surprised to see me, penguins? Zidgel: Well, we don't have extra juice boxes for ya, if that's what you mean. Cavitus: Well, lucky for you, I didn't come for a juice box. I've come for your galeezel. Bert: I have big plans for it! It'll come in handy, when I shrink the galaxy! (evil laughter) Cavitus: Plus, I want another cookie. The one I took from those cows was quite yummy. (evil laughter) Zidgel: Well, your taste buds are just going to have to wait, hamster fiend! Cavitus: (growls) Zidgel: Look out! Aah! Midgel: Come on, you can do it! You can do it! Aha! Midgel: Jumping Jupiter! Midgel: Uggh! Cavitus: (evil laughter) That was so easy! Like stealing cookies from a cow. Zidgel: (grunts) Cavitus: Aah! Cavitus: Woah! Jason: Okay, Kevin, here's the fun part. Operation: Cookie Rack Attack. Jason: Watch and learn, Michelle. You and Kevin just get ready to catch it. Kevin: Got it! Oh, hot, hot, hot, hot! Jason: Run! Grandmum: Goodness! What was that noise? (gasps) Oh, my cookies! Oh, those raccoons. Jason: What a disaster! I say, forget the cows, and focus on getting back to our normal size. Michelle: We can't give up. We have to help them! Jason: Why? I tried being helpful, but it's not working! And we've got our own stuff to take care of. Michelle: But we're the only ones who can help them with their fuel module! We're the ones with the cookie. Jason: But we're in way over our heads! Let's just get out of here while the gettin's good. Kevin: Could be worse. Jason: Oh yeah, how? Jason: Oh, great! That was our only way out of here! Now we're stuck down here! Michelle: Jason, settle down. I still got mine, but I need your help. Jason: (laughs) You're serious, aren't you? Zidgel: This is your last waltz, Cavitus! Cavitus: Oh, is that Elvis? Zidgel: What? Where? Zidgel: Woah! Woah! (grunts) Zidgel and Cavitus: (grunt) Michelle: Jason, this is the only way. Kevin: Vroom! Jason: No way, Michelle! I am not getting on any radio controlled cookies with you behind the wheel! Kevin: Vroom! Vroom. Broom! Jason: Kevin, what are you--? Broom! Michelle, go, go, go! Michelle: Oh, there we go! Thanks! Michelle: Hold on! Zidgel: Oof! Polkas, oof! Give me, oof! A headache! Uugh! Cavitus: This isn't a polka! It's, it's, (sniffs) did, someone smell barbecue? Cavitus: (cries out in pain) Fidgel: Oh! Cavitus: (screams) Jason and Kevin: Woah! Jason: It's no use. The cows'll just have to find somebody else's cookie. Jason: "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act." Grandmum was right, so is Michelle. It's not okay to hold back help, when someone really needs it. We're the only hope for the cows now. Jason: Michelle! Bring the cookie around again! It's helping time! Jason: Much better, sis! Michelle: Thanks, Jason! Midgel: Kevin! Help me out of here! Cavitus is here! He's in the attic! Jason and Michelle: Cavitus?! Jason: Wait, Kevin, I have a plan. Zidgel: Doctor, catch! Cavitus: (grunts) Cavitus: (evil laughter) You know, I didn't get my cookie, but there will be one teeny tiny consolation. You are going to be one tiny penguin now! (evil laughter) What? Cavitus: (screams) Fidgel: Captain, Pluto! Zidgel: Thanks, Doctor! Jason: I caught it! Cavitus: Stop them! Stop them! Jason: You're doing great, sis! Now come around, and strafe Cavitus! Michelle: That's not helping me! Jason: Loopdy loop and give him a haircut! Michelle: Why didn't you say so? Cavitus: No! No! Stop! Jason: Here's your cookie, Cavitus! Cavitus: Aah! Bert: No! Bert: This isn't the end, penguins! You'll see! Zidgel, Midgel, Fidgel, and Kevin: (laugh) Jason: Persimmon nut crunch acquired and delivered, ma'am! Zidgel: And even though several of my crew sat on it, and drove it around a little bit, it should still be clean enough for-- Cow captain: I'm sorry, Captain, but I thought you understood. It needs to be a very large cookie. Zidgel: Oh. Yes, of course. We knew that. Zidgel: Doctor, you forgot to biggerize it. You know, make it more large-ish. Midgel: What's wrong, Doc? Fidgel: I was only able to charge the galeezel enough for two uses. Midgel: And since the first shrunk Cavitus and the cookie-- Michelle: That leaves only one shot left! Jason: Only one shot?! Michelle, we need to use it on ourselves! It's our only chance to get home! Michelle: I wanna go home, too, Jason, but what about the cows? Do we just leave them stranded? Remember, "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act." Jason: I know, it means we need to help when we can. Kevin: If we don't, who will? Michelle: Yay, Jason! Rockhopper crew and cow captain: Hooray! Cow captain: Oh, thank you so much, all of you. And especially you two. I know what this cost you to help us. And there is a way that we can help you. May I, dear? Cow captain: Now that you've restored our ship to full power, look what we can do. Doctor. Fidgel: Why, it's completely charged. It's as good as new! Zidgel: Before we take you home, cadets, just wanted to say, thank you for helping us finally rid the galaxy of Cavitus, well, almost. Jason: And thank you for giving us people who help us. Michelle: And lots of opportunities to help others. Jason: And may we never forget to help when we see those in need. Michelle: Especially if we have the power to help them. Jason and Michelle: Amen. Grandmum: Just coming up to tuck in you two crickets. Oh, and Jason, I found this in the kitchen, and I'm afraid I stepped on it. Jason: That's okay, Grandmum. I can fix that easily. Would you like to help, Michelle? Michelle: You bet. Grandmum: Oh, you know, crumpets? I'm so glad you two are having a good time at the cottage. When you first arrived, I was a wee bit afraid that you would soon get bored, what with no friends nearby. But I'm grateful to see that you're getting along so well. Michelle: I guess this is just a special place, with lots of surprises. Grandmum: Oh, that's what Granddad always said. (sniffs) Huh, pleasant memories. Grandmum: Goodnight, pumpkins. Kevin: So long. Category:Transcripts Category:3-2-1 Penguins! transcripts Category:Finished Transcripts